#Nanette

I have written and rewritten over the last month or so.  There has been a lot of change and a lot of realisation and *groan* yeah, self reflection.  However, one thing that happened that has had the most impact, and thus restarted the process.. again (as it is supposed to happen in self reflection, I guess?), and that is watching Hannah Gadsby's Nanette on Netflix.  I have been wanting to see this ever since she started touring with it in Australia - I missed her dates in Tasmania, and was really glad when it was going to be accessible on Netflix.. and I am really hoping they make it into a DVD, because I would buy it. No question.
Nanette has struck a chord.  Globally it would seem.  I have been thinking about the common theme between the things that I have been writing about and they succinctly come into focus after Hannah's insight.  So much has to do with the existence of shame culture.  The rise of the #MeToo movement, the Rose Army, the suicides of high profile people, persecution of anyone who is different - for any reason, even the detention of refugees (regardless of the country detaining), and then my own personal insights and need for the changes I have made.  The underlying imbalace of power is shame.  Some arse making someone else feel shame for existing.
Hannah's story is relatable.  It defeats the message to sit and compare my experiences to another's, to allow a comparison of "who had it tougher" be the point of my thoughts - they are different, but the effect of feeling unworthy, being ashamed for being the person I am and self deprecation is present.  I live by the edict "the best defense is a good offense". If you pre-empt the snottiness you see coming, then at least you do not have to hear it.  And maybe - it is time to revise that.
I related to the animosity Hannah displays to being a victim.  It has never been something that has sat well with me.  I have always put that down to living with a chronic illness - I have a strong dislike for the words used in my profession that make people victims of physiological dysfunction - that is probably a post for another day!
Maybe there is negative feedback out there for Nanette - I have yet to see it (Turns Out The Entire World Totally Loves Hannah Gadsby’s ‘Nanette’).  Maybe what she has to say is being heard. Hopefully, it will make a difference.  
It has made a difference to me, in more ways than those I have mentioned here.
Which, I guess, is the whole point.